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Best & worst TV in 2005

The Best

“Arrested Development” — You’ve read it before, and now you’ll read again: “Arrested Development” is the funniest show on television. Barring some kind of divine intervention (or Showtime or ABC), Fox will give this TV rarity (a funny sitcom) the boot due to low ratings.

“Deadwood” — There was no sophomore slump here, folks. This foul-mouthed, Shakespearean Western ropes you in. Al Swearengen (Ian McShane) is the best bad guy worth rooting for since Tony Soprano.

“The Shield” — FX’s enthralling cop drama brought Glenn Close in as the new captain to go toe-to-toe with Vic Mackey (charismatic Michael Chiklis) for its fourth season with positively riveting results. Best. Darn. Cop show. Period.

“Veronica Mars” — This smart, witty, pop-culture-reference-filled and occasionally moving teen noir featuring a strong, intelligent teenage girl lead (the terrific Kristen Bell) has become the heir apparent to “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” with its rabid cultlike followers. Thankfully, the show is worthy of such devotion.

“The Daily Show with Jon Stewart” — Who knew the news could be this funny?

“Lost” — With its weekly cliffhanger endings and blink-and-you’ll-miss-’em clues, this ABC drama has become positively interactive, driving fans to the Internet to learn everything they can. The addition of the “tailies” (the tail section survivors) has pumped more intrigue and confrontation into a show that wasn’t exactly short on those things in the first place.

“The Staircase” — This eight-part documentary series on the Sundance Channel about the murder of a North Carolina woman and the eventual conviction of her husband turned out to be the most haunting thing on TV all year.

“My Name is Earl” — Much like “Arrested Development,” this sitcom — about a flawed, but well-intentioned petty thief (a perfectly cast Jason Lee) who just wants to set his karma straight — has got smart writing and a strong ensemble cast. “Earl” is proof that NBC can still make a sitcom if it puts its mind to it.

“The Closer” — A rare cop drama featuring a woman in the lead. Deputy Chief Brenda Johnson (the captivating Kyra Sedgwick), an Atlanta cop transplanted to Los Angeles, is neurotic and imperfect, but she’s great at her job. Watching Johnson catch the bad guys while dealing with office politics, including co-workers who don’t like her, proved to be a highlight of the summer TV season.

“Everybody Hates Chris” — Narrated by Chris Rock, with a winning performance by Tyler James Williams as the young Chris, this UPN hit proves the networks can make a sitcom about a family that isn’t mean-spirited and/or stupid.

The Worst

“The Apprentice: Martha Stewart” — It wasn’t a good thing. Everybody was so high on Martha after she got out of jail … then her reality show aired and everybody remembered why they hated her in the first place.

“War at Home” — A supposed sitcom that thinks being politically incorrect is a substitute for actually being funny.

“Sex, Love and Secrets” — UPN’s attempt to launch a prime-time soap. It was about as popular as anything starring Denise Richards can be.

“Nip/Tuck” — Not one character behaves like an actual human being on this show. And it didn’t take a brainiac to figure out who the Carver was.

“Britney & Kevin: Chaotic” — Alleged “singer” Britney Spears’ reality show using home movies of her and deadbeat hubby, Kevin Federline, was met with the same shoulder-shrugging indifference by the public as her last CD.

“American Dad” — The poor man’s “Family Guy,” and that’s really saying something considering “Family Guy” is a poor man’s “Simpsons.”

“Alias” — This spy drama was always preposterous, but you still cared about the character. This season, it appears the show’s creators stopped caring and so did the viewers.

“The Starlet” — Faye Dunaway channeled her inner-Simon Cowell for this horrible reality show that wanted to be “American Idol” for young actresses. Dunaway catchphrase — “Don’t call us, we’ll call you” — is pretty much how viewers felt about the show.

“Trading Spouses,” “Wife Swap,” “Nanny 911,”

“Supernanny,” “Brat Camp” — Any reality show that exploits children or exposes them to the type of people who allow themselves to appear on a reality show is the work of the devil.

“Taradise” — “Actress” Tara Reid flies around the globe and parties. No wonder the rest of the world hates the United States.

American dad rules ! fuck it !